Four Little Monsters Mommy Blog

A few weeks ago I prepared to send my seven year old KM off to Grandma's house for the weekend, her first overnight away from home from all her siblings. I knew she needed a break from the chaos at home, the constant push and pull of our big family. KM prepared in her own way, anxiously writing up a list of the things she'd ask Grandma to do. The list looked like this:

1. Take me to McDonald's.
2. Take me to Toys R Us.
3. Take me to the Dollar Store.

KM's Poppy and Grandma (my parents) divorced back when I was thirteen years old. In other words, my kids know them with two separate homes and in two different states. So I had to explain to KM shortly after reading her list that a weekend at Grandma's house would be absolutely nothing like spending time with her dearest Poppy who spoils her with trips to the store for stickers, toys and candy nearly every chance he gets. When I was a child, I explained, Poppy  liked to buy me stickers and toys, too. My Mom, however, preferred experiences as gifts. Never once did I step foot in a toy store with my own mother. No way. KM looked at me, heart broken. When I was a kid, that fact drove me crazy, too. Now that I'm the Mom, I can give KM the whole stop telling people to buy you things routine. 

I felt the urge to warn KM about Grandma even further. Not only would KM not go to McDonald's or to the toy store, but Grandma would likely put her to work. If a weekend at Grandma's house now was anything like I remember, there would be lots and lots of dirt and earth involved and you'd go to bed dead tired every night. KM wasn't sure what to make of what probably seemed like nonsense talk but I knew she'd soon discover what I meant.

See, Grandma believes in this long forgotten idea that kids belong outside. Not just outside, but in the forest, connecting with the earth, learning about the types of trees and wildflowers, feeling the gentle rush of cool stream water across the back of our hand as you lean over the side of a canoe. No cell phones. No Nintendo DS. No television. For me, it would have been a Gameboy. When I was little, I climbed mountains and canoed rivers and creeks with my Mom every other weekend. The rest of the time, we lived with my Dad, went to school and watched television or played with our friends.

KM was in for an adventure, I knew. She'd been on plenty of adventures with me but Grandma was a whole new level of adventure. Grandma is the real deal. She is a woman with two huge black and tan coon hounds, a woman who grows her own food in her back yard, who raises her own chickens and bee colonies.

When we met up with Grandma and I let KM go off on her own, I almost cried. I hoped she wouldn't give Grandma any of her "mouth-talk" and occasional bratty demands, etc. If she did, I knew Grandma wouldn't put up with it and KM would call me on the phone "I want to come home!"

Turns out, KM did just fine and very likely found her soul out there in the woods, just as I did with my Mom years ago. Here are the emails and pictures Grandma sent me:

"A very local breakfast featured our own fresh eggs and fresh smoked bacon from the local Amish market just a few miles away. She loved the taste of fresh bacon! At the river she went out a good half mile (there were fishermen much farther out) hopping and jumping, very confident and careful"


"On the beeyard she helped pull the big hive body off the new hive, feed them (see the honey jars) and help inspect the frames for the laying queen."

I really lost it. Tears, tears, everywhere. KM's weekend with Grandma was a masterpiece. I hoped that she would come home refreshed, awakened and aware.

She surprised me with a box full of wild flowers she dug up out of the earth to transplant into our yard, their roots enclosed in wet, muddy Ziploc bags. In the box, they wilted, silently begging for dirt and care and running out of time. Grandma made her promise to plant them as soon as possible and to take care of them.

As soon as we arrived home, KM was off on her bike across the street with a friend, back to ol' busy as a bee self. My husband planted the wildflowers in our garden, shaking his head at KM's forgetfulness, and watering them himself. Within hours they stood upright.

Even kids need to learn how to slow down and look around at our natural world. At our house, things always moving rapidly. KM is used to the fast paced, ever-changing environment of a household of six. At Grandma's house, every minute is appreciated. I remember the feeling well. I'm so grateful that KM felt it, too. It's hard to attain that sense of peace and wonder that you get from a quiet forest when you're back and forth to school, glued to your homework or stuck inside the playroom with your loud and rambunctious little siblings.

I make sure to smile at those wildflowers out in our garden each day where they stand tall and proud and point them out to the kids. KM says she can't wait to stay with Grandma again. I'm sure her list of to-dos the next time around will be very different.

1. Walk along the river, skip stones.
2. Hike the Appalachian Trail.
3. Feed the chickens, gather eggs.
4. Tend to the bees.
5. Go to McDonald's.

Wait, what!? What's that last one? Turns out that Grandma did take her to McDonald's after all. Hey, wait a minute!

There are certain authors and certain poets whose written words literally connect with those inner parts of me that as a super busy work-at-home Mom, I tend to forget about. See, I'm a bit of a nature spirit at my core. When I read these certain works, I can feel these parts of me again. Most Moms won't say it or maybe they don't agree, but with so much going on constantly, a spirit, whatever it's made of, can go numb. I don't mean this in a bad way, it's just what seems to happen, to me particularly, when there's literally no time for myself. It takes these other voices to call my spirit back out from time to time. Mary Oliver and Annie Dillard are just two of the authors that I can continuously count on in this way. There are many, but for this post, I'll focus on my most recent discovery and literary savior.  

A recent addition to this list of authors who can call out that hiding spirit in me: Amy Lou Jenkins. Author of "Every Natural Fact: Five Seasons of Open-Air Parenting", Jenkins took me to a place where mother and child unite and find peace, answers, questions unanswered and togetherness in nature. With this book, I'm reminded of my deep love of nature fostered in much the same way as Jenkins fostered her son DJ. For myself, my connection with nature was born in the woods with my own Mom, backpacking on the Appalachian Trail, canoeing and portaging through Algonquin, Canada or back country camping under the stars in Maine or Vermont. My Mom was my reality rock and yet she was also my enemy in ways only a teenager can manage. Thanks to her, no matter what she was at any given time, when we were together, we were together in the woods. I recognized myself a strong young woman for the first time on the summit of Mount Katahdin. These reasons must be why this book connects with me so strongly.

The life of a Mom parallels the joys and hard truths of the natural world in so many ways. Jenkins beautifully weaves her own questions about life, her bitterness with certain relationships, personal struggles together with the natural environment around her, all in the company of her almost-teen DJ. In Jenkins' case, her natural world is Wisconsin, which I enjoyed learning about having never traveled there myself. Her prose maintains a fluidity and beauty that allows the reader to really feel the setting without lingering on anything too matter-of-fact for too long.

Throughout the book she talks briefly about life as a woman, a mother and a wife recalling specific events or instances which was many times familiar to me. The human experience and the parenting experience, like the natural world, contains many bits of joy and  many bits of sadness. In the time I was reading this book, I'd attended two funerals of loved ones including my grandmother and by the time I finished the book, my Uncle was in the hospital with complications following a heart attack, given a 50/50 chance of survival. A portion of this book deals with death and obviously, that resonated with me very much.

Jenkins writes that "The entire forest is a composition of bits of organic matter that come from life feeding on death. Remnants of foxes, tadpoles, wild geraniums, and trout lilies had perhaps cycled through the people who lived near this place... every element that passed out of my body in the form of my son is now in use elsewhere." Pages later she writes, "My faith isn't that strong. Death can be stingless, but it doesn't always show up as a natural phenomenon of intellectual and spiritual beauty... I'm angry about terrorists and politicians who kill to demonstrate their power, and I won't find a way to think of murder and genocide as beautiful... The idea of life as a cycle, the reuse, the rebirth, and the constant freshness of new life mixed with the seasoned, I see the beauty and sense in this." 

A book like this reminds me to get my own kids out into the forest more often, not only because it's good for them but because they'll learn things from nature in a greater, more powerful way than I could ever teach them within the walls of our home or along the pavement of our town. They'll learn things about spirituality, birth, death, family, survival and so on in a setting that is unconfined and very real.

One of the most beautiful passages for me reads, "My youngest offspring is leaving childhood. I've crossed over to middle age. My worth as a human is not based in reproduction; I will do no more to propel my genes into the future through childbirth. Biologically, if not spiritually, my raison d'etre is to care for and protect the earth, so that my life will flow and reside in future generations. I am a water woman who grew babies in the amniotic sea beneath my breath. I live in a chronologically advancing awareness of my final reconciliation with the earth."

I'm a Mom of four young children but one day, I'll have to let each of them go into the world. No matter how far or near this time any given mother is, it's something that lingers on our minds always. I found this passage particularly sad and gorgeous and amazing all at the same time. Mothers are the caretakers of the earth in the end, as we spend so much of our lives teaching our children how to live here on this planet.

Bravo, Amy Lou Jenkins!

Order your copy HERE.

I recently attended a Box Tops University event in Philadelphia. If you're the parent of a school aged child then you've likely heard all about Box Tops, those colorful little 10 cent coupons on many everyday grocery products. Since 1996, Box Tops for Education has helped schools earn $440 million dollars. You're probably already a pro at cutting them out and sending them into class with your child. These coupons are incredibly important for raising extra money for your school. Old news, you might think. What else is there to know? Actually, lots!

There are so many new things going on with Box Tops that it's easier than ever to raise even more money for your child's school.

First of all, there are new brands featuring the Box Tops for Education coupons this year. You're used to seeing the coupons on General Mills cereal, Green Giant lettuce, Fruit Roll-Ups, Nature Valley bars, Juicy Juice, Old El Paso Taco kits, Pillsbury products, Betty Crocker cake mix, Ziploc bags, etc. Throughout the year, you'll find Box Tops on more and more products. For instance, you'll find the coupons on Brita water filtration systems and filters, Betty Crocker sides, General Mills Fiber Bars, Green Giant cans and carrots, raisins and asparagus, Juice Juice's low sugar juice, Avery, and Hanes underwear and socks. You can view and download a complete list of participating products at btfe.com/products. If you're a Box Top coordinator, consider printing this list for parents who may not be aware of these new options.

Online shoppers now have access to a full line of Box Tops for Education products at www.shop.generalmills.com. There are so many fun things available featuring Box Top supporting brands like Betty Crocker and General Mills. Items for sale include t-shirts, snack containers, hats, corn cob holders and so much more. You can even purchase Box Top collection containers, totes and notebooks. Enter code BT10 for 10% savings!

Traveling this summer? Earn eBoxTops using Expedia, Hotels.com, Hotwire, and SouthWest Vacations. For every $10 spent with Expedia, your school recieves 1 eBoxTop. For every $10 spent at hotel.com your school receives 3.25 eBoxTops. How cool is that? You can also earn eBoxTops from Best Buy, Barnes and Noble, Campmor, Target and Garmin. Visit btfe.com/marketplace to find even more retailers participating in the eBoxTop program.

Box Tops for Education has also teamed up with ACME, Albertsons, Cub, Farm Fresh, Jewel-Osco, Shaw's, Shop 'n Save and Shoppers to form Growing Local Learning. This is a bonus Box Tops program that's very simple to join. Visit growinglocallearning.com and join, earning you 5 Bonus Box Tops. When you join, you enter in your preferred store and then your school. You have access to coupons and recipes featuring Box Top participating products. Since 2010, Growing Local Learning has earned an extra $2 million for schools.

Growing Local Learning Bonus Box Tops are earned electronically through the website. Schools automatically earn Box Top credits when they enter in a special Growing Local Learning code found on the register receipt. General Mills Box Tops for Education products participate in this program. You can locate the codes to enter on the website on special coupons that print out at checkout and on peel off stickers on products. Codes can be obtained during special promotions in the store as well. Since you'll enter in your local preferred store, the website will direct you to that particular store's promotions all year long. Here's an example: I can get 10 Bonus Box Tops ($1.00) when I buy any 10 General Mills products in one transaction by April 20th 2012. The online redemption code is printed at check out. Enter in the code online and POOF, the Box Tops are electronically submitted (this particular offer is good at any participating store).

At the Growing Local Learning website you can keep track of your school's earnings as compared to other local schools and keep track of your own personal earnings. Refer friends and earn 5 more Bonus Box Tops per friend if they sign up.

Fellow Mom Bloggers and I support Box Tops for Education!

A whole morning spent talking about Box Tops at Box Tops University got me thinking about more ways to encourage coordinators and parents to earn Box Tops. Here's what we came up with, with help from Philadelphia area coordinators:

• When buying a gift for a teacher, consider an item from www.shop.generalmills.com!
• Hang up a goal poster in your school, with a specific item or item(s) you want to "earn" using Box Tops, that way parents know what they're sending in their Box Tops for. This is more encouraging than just "earning money". Parents like to know what the money will go towards. 
• Organize a Box Top Kiddie committee to walk with adults throughout neighborhoods to ask for Box Tops. People without children may not realize they're throwing away money for schools.
• Schools can offer incentives for the student or class that brings in the most Box Tops in a given period (my kids' school already does this).

Did you know that every school can have up to 5 Box Top coordinators? How many does your school have? Could your school use a bit more help? It's a lot of work to perform the tasks of a Box Top coordinator. If you've got time to volunteer, consider helping out.

If you thought Box Tops were only good for raising money for schools then you're wrong. While these cute little coupons are very good at that particular job, they also help to power 55,000 homes in Western Kentucky. What? Yes, it's true. After a human being accepts and counts all the Box Tops sent in from your school, they are sent to an incinerator that supports a wind farm there. Actually, everything you send is sent to that incinerator except for the staples. Well, maybe not your cell phone and yes, they receive plenty of those too.

Disclosure: Four Little Monsters Blog was invited to attend Box Top University in Philadelphia. All opinions belong to EJ, the blogger. Information, gift card and free samples have been provided by General Mills.